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Sooner or later, in every relationship – in the church, at home, with co-workers or neighbors – we will disappoint someone or hurt someone. As Paul reminds us, “all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23).
It is tempting to believe that our intentions are what matter most in relationships. If we don’t intend to hurt people or let them down, then any hurt feelings must result from a misunderstanding. We may clarify our original intentions and defend our perspective. If we can help others see where they have misunderstood us by explaining what we meant to do or say, the problem will be solved.
Perhaps unsurprisingly, this approach often fails. Why? Because when our words and actions hurt people, our good intentions are beside the point. Even unintended hurt still hurts. But what if we truly believed the promise of God to meet our repentance with grace? Could we dare to turn fully to our neighbors, to set aside our need to justify ourselves and to consider things from their perspective rather than our own? Repentance is not about recording “who’s right” but about recovering the beloved community.
This message is excerpted from the Bible study “Turn, turn, turn: A time for faithful repentance” (Session two) by Meghan Johnston Aelabouni in the October 2018 Gather magazine.