Called to Be Comforters

"The Jews who were with her in the house, consoling her, saw Mary get up quickly and go out. They followed her because they thought that she was going to the tomb to weep there" (John 11:31).

Mary’s brother, Lazarus, had died, and now they came, the women and men, the wailers. They had been called; this was their task. They were to help the family grieve. They were there to aid them in their weeping — to weep for them and with them.

The term wailers is foreign to us, but isn’t that what we are called to be when we go to someone’s home after a death? We listen to the person’s story, the repeated story of the suffering and death, of the loss of someone dear. And then we weep with the person. "A grief shared is a grief divided." The saying is so true. If we have nothing to say but can only cry with someone in grief, we have given a gift. Often crying with the grieving is more powerful than any eloquent words we may speak. In fact, simplistic answers are more of a detriment to comfort than sharing in the despair, the loneliness of loss, and the shock of death.

God calls us, then, but not to make everything better. At that moment no one can do that. We are called to share the moment, horrific as it is. We are there as companions on the journey, as a calming presence, as the arms of God wrapped around the one who grieves. We are there to weep with those who weep.

Prayer
Dear Lord, you call us to be comforters. You call us to be your arms, your tears, your strength. Help us to take this call seriously, with sincerity and with humility. Be with us in our comforting. Help us to be aware of the needs around us. Amen

Linda Beckman is director of the South Dakota Synod Resource Center, Evangelical Lutheran Church in America.

Scripture quotations are from the New Revised Standard Version (NRSV) Bible, copyright © 1989 by the Division of Christian Education of the National Council of Churches of Christ in the USA, and are used by permission. All rights reserved.

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