A Time to Weep

"[There is] a time to weep and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance. ..." (Ecclesiastes 3:4)

Michael’s favorite stuffed dog had already been relegated to the top of the closet for years when his brother died. Several nights later we went in to tuck the covers around him before we retired. There cuddled in his arms was "Dowg." In the morning when I called to him to get up, "Dowg" was nowhere in sight.

This went on for months. His mind told him that at 11 he was too old for stuffed toys, but his hurting heart needed the comfort of that old, ratty stuffed animal. The day he was ready to put grief behind him the dog returned permanently to the closet shelf.

I’ve often heard the comment made about a grieving friend, "It’s time she got over all that mourning. After all Harry (or whoever) has been dead for months now."

Every time I hear words like that I think about Michael and "Dowg." Only the grieving heart knows when it is the right time to put the sorrow aside. If we try to hurry either our friends or ourselves through the process, the grieving won’t be complete, and the hurt won’t heal.

Jesus told us to pray that we will have the strength to handle whatever comes to us. Praying for our grieving friends is the best encouragement we can give them.

Beyond the Door
1. Has a child ever helped you grieve? Reflect on that experience.

2. Praying for grieving friends is something we all can do. Some people even have a little booklet in which they write names of friends to pray for, and their situations — it helps them remember as they pray. Might something like that work for you?

3. When you were growing up, did you have a special stuffed animal or toy that brought you solace?

4. As an adult, do you have such an object?

5. At your next circle meeting talk about what items in your life help bring you solace — and thank God for them. Better yet, plan a "solace show-and-tell" and ask each woman to bring an item to the meeting and to be prepared to share her story.